"Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it without knowing what's going to happen next."

Why Marriage

  • You need people 

    I’m reminded of what I read in A.C. Ping’s book Do,
    You can go to the most amazing, stunningly beautiful places in the world and they will be nothing without people. But people can also make unbearable places a lot more friendly. I recently found myself in Barcelona, sitting in the marina watching an amazing sunset. As the sun disappeared behind the hills that surround the city, the whole sky turned shades of pink, then orange, and then as if by magic the lights of the city began to appear. It was breathtaking, but all I wanted to do was share it with someone, just to say, “Wow, look at that!”
    Our enjoyment of wonderful experiences is heightened by the presence of another, and the suffering we face in the presence of crisis/calamity is lessened by the presence of another. And this is why I love marriage, because at the end of the day, you always have someone to share those seemingly insignificant moments that happened during the day, that crazy thought you had, that idea that popped up in the middle of rush hour, or that cranky old boss you want to vent about. At the end of the day, you have someone to share the wonder of experience, someone to say, “Wow, look at that!” to.
    We cannot be human without another human…
    My humanity is bound up in yours, for we can only be human together.
    -Archbishop Desmond Tutu from the book Do, by A.C. Ping
  • You get more out of life when you share it with another person.

    Ecclesiastes 4:9-11 Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. 10 For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow. But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up! 11 Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone?
    Throughout the years, my parents have alternated roles. In the Philippines while my mom went to school for nursing, my dad was a history teacher and principal. When they moved to the states, it was because my mom was drafted as a nurse. My dad followed, and while he went to school to also become a nurse, my mom went to work. At some point, they both worked and shared the responsibility of parenting. Then my mom lost her job, and my dad worked. Now they are both retiring and trying out some business ventures in the Philippines.
    Through it all, they have helped and supported each other. It makes a difference when you have someone else to share both the burden and the blessings that work brings. I don’t think my parents would have been able to do all this without each other. This verse is most definitely true with my parents.
  • (shhhhh!) Divorce is the “D” word.

    It’s the worst of all expletives and should never never never be talked about. Make it a pact to never talk about it because if it’s never the solution, never the answer, then you’re bound to make it work. I remember hearing this somewhere, “Happily married or unhappily married, but always married.” By making this pact, you are honoring your promises, you are vowing you will always be a team, and you are giving the other person the gift of your unconditional love.

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